A Lisburn man forms a soccer team to help men grieving after the loss of a child

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Wayne Nelson

A Lisbon man forms a soccer team to help other men cope with grief after losing a child.

Wayne Nelson’s daughter Paige was born dead ten years ago and now forms the Sands United squad in Lisburn to help other grieving men cope with their loss.

Sands United FC is a unique opportunity for grieving parents and family members to meet the love of the sport and find a support network where they can calmly express their grief when they are ready.

Teams also remember the very short lifespan of their children, proudly displaying their names on the kit they wore to each game.

Across the UK, there are currently 34 Sands United teams, six of them in Northern Ireland. There are Sands United teams in Lisburn, Larna, Belfast, Derry, Enniskillen and Dungano.

Wayne told Belfast Live why he decided to join the Sands in creating a soccer team.

She said: My daughter was born and she slept 30 weeks. We have three other children and they were all premature. I mean Paige would be the healthiest of the four, but at least for some reason she didn’t. to survive. He’ll be ten now, just his heart breaking.

“But I’ve never told my wife about my feelings and she’s still not quite sure how I felt when I had him. I’ve heard stories from other Sands bands in Belfast and Derry about what the guys are doing. Gather it up and talk about it. They’re not in a hurry, talk about it, and I will They talk about it when they are ready.

“I don’t know if I would ever go out and tell people how I feel about all this. I’m heartbroken and think about it every day, but it’s God’s way — God wanted it and it was.”

“But you sit and think, What would it be like, what are you going to do in elementary school?” He’s going to high school soon, it’s crazy to think.

“I want to do something for him. I love football and follow it, but at first I can’t tell you how the people in the team train, it’s all new to me. But it will be useful for you to play this game. My daughter. At the end of the day, all I will do will be It is for her.”



Sands United Lisburn

Wayne’s wife Gillian said joining a team is important because men can often express their feelings to appear “forced” after a mistake.

“He doesn’t want to say anything to me or the kids because he’s trying to be strong for us, which I think most men feel,” he said.

“If they are considered strong, they should be there to support them, but not to support them. This is why such a thing is so necessary.”

Wayne hopes to create a safe space where the grieving man can feel the support of his teammates, even if they are not ready to understand their pain.

He added, “I can’t wait to start it. Even if people don’t want to open up, they know they will be surrounded by other men who have experienced what they’ve been through too. They don’t need to.” Talk to them, we know why they are there.

Sands United Lisburn will hold its first practice session on Wednesday, April 6 from 19:00-20:00 at Lisnagar High School.

You can learn more about the team and participate by clicking here.

Source: Belfastlive

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