Sociologist and sex educator Barbara Rothmüller with a comment on the tiresome question of whether girls like nerds – or not.
On a dating site forum, a single person asks if he should keep his hobby a secret while dating. “How do you react if a man likes to play computer games? Is the hobby considered a no-go for women?” The male nerd who sits forever single at the computer and plays video games all night instead of going out with girls: it’s a cliché that doesn’t come to mind because there are other genders and people in relationships who play excessively.
Besides, the virtual world is not so non-erotic. There are now some games on the market that offer opportunities to flirt, fall in love with game characters and even have sex. Things aren’t going very well with virtual love yet. When sex is not only suggested but actually experienced, the scenes often seem embarrassing because they are poorly implemented. Apparently game developers place more value on realistic scenes of violence. As with porn, sex in video games is done without context and relationship and therefore feels empty. I refrain from criticizing the sexualization of female figures.
Even if the eroticism seems ridiculous at times, many aspects of human sexuality have already arrived in video games – from one-night stands or love triangles to same-sex love, everything can be experienced virtually. For example, the role-playing game “The Witcher 3”, in which the passion flares between a witch and two wizards, is praised in the gaming community. The possibilities for nerds to play with sexuality are more diverse than one might think.
Still, many guys wonder if their hobby doesn’t make them seem sexy. For Frederika, who sees herself as “a young, modern woman”, “the hobby of computer games is completely normal, I sometimes play games myself”, she reassures the man on the forum, who prefers to remain anonymous. But it’s clear to her: “If you really want to live in a partnership, you have to be willing to compromise and invest time and attention in your partner.” And another woman adds a tip that applies to both sex and gambling: “Playing together is a lot of fun! I could do nothing with a man who has nothing in common with me.”
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dr. Barbara Rothmüller, sociologist and sex educator
Source: Krone
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